On Either Engaging in or Escaping Life

“An instinct simultaneously to engage in life and escape from it is not unusual in creative people.” - David Cornwell

David Cornwell is probably better known by his pseudonym, John Le Carre. Much lie the E.B. White quote from the other day, this quote resonates with me quite a bit.

When do I engage? When do I “run away” and hide? When do I save the world? When do I savor the world?

I think, as a creative person, I want to do both at once. I have the energy and creativity and knowledge and awareness of what’s right and what’s wrong with the world and I want to tell everyone! But at the same time, it takes so much energy, so much work, so much charisma to help people see what I already see.

And as an introverted intuitive, that’s a lot of energy to spend helping other people to see what they don’t necessarily want to see, either because it is too hard, or challenges their ideas, or because they believe they are right, just as I believe I am.

I want to talk to people about my art. But as soon as I do I regret having done so. I want to share ideas and philosophies with people. But I also want to go live in a cabin so deep in the woods it takes 2 days of traveling only on foot to reach it.

So what do I do? I make art. Sometimes anyway. Then I make crafts in order to engage. Then I make art to disengage. Then I wonder how to define myself as an artist: as an engager or as an escaper?

And so it goes. And so it goes. And so it goes.